In love, engaged, married or just single! The motto is live and let live! In this article I will show you what you should never say to your single girlfriends.
What is your relationship status? Looking, solo vacation, in a relationship or something else? And what about your girlfriends in this area?
Maybe they just got out of a relationship or are they enjoying being single to the fullest?
In fact, today our society has a certain image of the perfect woman and man and what their life should be like. This also includes the perfect love, relationship, marriage, children and the whole program.
Not to mention that expectation is a bad thing in itself, but remember that every person is unique and finds happiness in their own way.
Studies also show (1) that people often prefer to cling to bad relationships rather than let them go.
In this sense, the widespread idea that women break up with one another after a breakup is not surprising glass of wine, lick their wounds or, on the contrary, immediately start a new search for the perfect man.
A stereotype that I don't want to let us girls sit on.
Women need to stick together and not put each other down. Whether fresh out of a breakup or permanently single, there are words that are better left unspoken.
So please, never say those things to your single friends!Table of ContentsShow 1 things you should never say to your single girlfriends 1.1 1. We really need to find someone for you! 1.2 2. Lower your standards! 1.3 3. Have you ever tried online dating? 1.4 4. Your ex-partner was the worst 1.5 5. Your biological clock is ticking! 1.6 6. You must know that relationships are not easy! 1.7 7. You can do so much better! 1.8 8. Now you can finally do what you want! 1.9 9. Your prince comes when you least expect him! 1.10 10. Adapt a little better 2 What to say to your single girlfriends 3 Conclusion 3.1 4 Sources
Things you should never say to your single girlfriends
All of us go through tough times from time to time. Sometimes these are related to our love life or the fact that we don't have one.
Each of us deals with such situations in our own way. We as friends should always deal with it the same way. And that's offering support instead of condemnation.
Therefore, you should never say the following things to your single girlfriends:
1. We really need to find someone for you!
Why? This sentence is only appropriate if your girlfriend has complained about her being single and asked for help finding a partner. Everything else is just plain rude.
At this point you should be careful and don't rush into anything.
Have you thought about whether your girlfriend might be happy alone? If so, then this statement of yours could hurt her deeply.
No woman has to necessarily have a man to be happy. We can do it alone.
2. Lower your standards!
Even if you mean well, of course, such words should never leave your mouth. In other words, that way you're telling her to just settle for less.
What's so bad about having certain demands, anyway?< /strong>
Of course there is no such thing as the perfect man, just like the perfect woman, but each of us should have healthy standards about what is and is okay for us in a person not.
How would it fare if the answer you got was that your standards could have been higher?
3. Have you ever tried online dating?
Nowadays, love and dating have also taken on a whole new dimension through various online platforms and various matching sites.
However, many people who enjoy using dating platforms say they are equally attracted to online dating and real-life dates. (2)
Which form your girlfriend tends towards is actually clear based on this question. However, this question could come across as ”Try online dating if all else fails”.
We have to be very careful in our choice of words so as not to hurt feelings and carry a guilty conscience.
4. Your ex was the worst
My question at this point would be: What exactly do you want to achieve with it? When your girlfriend needs you to vent and vent her resentment and anger, you should just listen.
But it's not a good idea to confess to her now that you didn't think he was right for her or that you didn't like him.
What you will do is make her feel like you lied to her all along. It will be a big blow to your friendship.
But if you really want to show her your support, show her that this moment is a moment of salvation and she can learn important lessons from this difficult but important situation.
5. Your biological clock is ticking!
It took me a really long time to create a situation where it's ok to say something like that to any woman. And I came to an important conclusion – There is none.
This statement really crosses all boundaries and has nothing to do with support and friendship.
What women do with themselves and their bodies, is entirely her business.
If your girlfriend has a strong desire to have children but hasn't found a partner yet, don't you think she's aware of it? There is absolutely no reason to rub salt in the wound and make such statements.
Your biological clock is your business and not something whose ticking becomes the problem for others should.
6. You must know that relationships are not easy!
Wow, that's certain important news for her that she didn't know until now (sarcasm off). Studies also prove that relationships always have their own challenges. (4).
Let's be honest, just because your girlfriend has finally made a decision for herself and her well-being doesn't give you the right to judge her for it.
Should she have stayed in a toxic relationship and been unhappy to prove she knows what a real relationship looks like?
I'm sure that as a grown woman she knows exactly what it takes for a relationship to be a happy one.
She doesn't owe anyone anything and doesn't have to prove anything to anyone. Especially when it interferes with their happiness and complacency.
7. You can do so much better!
So first of all, whiteß she probably did it herself, otherwise she wouldn't have ended her previous relationship. And second, why do you think she's desperately looking for someone better?
Maybe your girlfriend just wants to enjoy her time to herself.< /strong>
Perhaps the person who is better for her at this point is herself. She wants to find herself again, experience peace, get to know herself again and devote herself to self-care .
It is precisely these rituals of self-care that are important in order not only to be in harmony with ourselves, but also to understand our needs and expectations from a potential partner. (3)
Not all happiness in the world lies in finding a partner for life. You have to find yourself first.
8. Now you can finally do what you want!
Have you heard this sentence before?
My friend told me this phrase haunted her for weeks after their breakup. The funny thing is, that's actually what she's been doing the whole time.
She lived her life normally, didn't let anything be forbidden or bit back your one or the other wish, um to please your partner.
Nevertheless, you have to be fair and say that within a relationship you want to discuss one or two things with your partner before making big plans.
So the problem here isn't whether it's true or not, but how it makes your girlfriend feel. Is she happy that she doesn’t have to discuss plans with anyone? Was she for the breakup or was she abandoned?
What may seem positive to you may cause great wounds and pain in her.
< h3 id="h-9-your-prince-comes-when-you-least-expect-him">9. Your prince comes when you least expect him!
The concept all about love when we're not expecting it raises a lot of questions in itself. This is especially true when women are ready to have love and a partner in their lives again.
What's wrong with dating?
So do you have to do nothing and hold back to find love?
Is it wrong to long for a new partner?
Of course you want to relieve your girlfriend’s cramp she feels to find the right partner, but you also have to think about whether such statements really bring anything useful.
10. Adapt a little better
It's nice when you want to give your girlfriend some useful advice and support, foreseeable she has shown that she wants it. real
But it's quite a different matter to indirectly blame her for being the reason you're single.
Advice in which you suggest to your girlfriend that she should better herself bow and bend instead of finding a man who accepts her is beyond questionable.
A relationship is about acceptance and compromise, not about giving up on yourself , so as not to be alone at all costs.
Therefore, your girlfriends will not like to hear such statements that make it difficult to adapt to being single instead of accepting it.
What you should say to your single girlfriends
When we talk about love, there is often the idea that a woman is only truly happy with one partner or in a relationship; can be happy.
But that is far from the truth. You don't have to be in a relationship to feel true happiness in life.
This also applies to your girlfriends. You don't have to feel sorry for them, search for them, comfort them or advise them. Unless they ask for it! That's a very important point.
If that's not the case, then I'm sure you'll continue to find many other topics of conversation.
Show her your support and just be the friend she needs and keep having fun with. without constantly discussing being single.
Your friendship is about so much more than just men!
Even when it comes to best friends, when it comes to being single, there are certain phrases that are better left unsaid.
Even if you mean well, remember that certain things can hurt or upset your girlfriend. Therefore you should choose your words more carefully.
Your Way uses only peer-reviewed studies and trusted sources to ensure our content is truthful, accurate, and reliable.
1. S Joel and G McDonald: We're Not That Choosy: Emerging Evidence of a Progression Bias in Romantic Relationships, Sage Journals
2. EJ Finkel, PW Eastwick, BR Karney, HT Reis, and S Sprecher: Online Dating: A Critical Analysis From the Perspective of Psychological Science, Sage
3. Godfrey C M, Harrison M B, Lysaght R, Lamb M, Graham ID, Oakley P: The experience of self-care: a systematic review, National Library of Medicine
4 . M Apostolou and Y Wang: The Challenges of Keeping an Intimate Relationship: An Evolutionary Examination, Sage Journals