To understand narcissistic behavior, you need to know a person who has the personality disorder and you need to experience the behavior first hand, otherwise you wouldn't believe that there are people who are willing to to do whatever it takes to get what they want.
People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) feel overtired. ig awesome, they lack empathy for other people and have an insatiable need to be admired.
They simply believe that they deserve special treatment and that they are the best at whatever they do.
These traits surface later in life when these Individuals are growing up, reaching sexual maturity or when they are ready for a relationship.
The fact that a person has NPD is not immediately apparent because you don’t have to share this secret with anyone else yet.
Actually it is, but only within the family, but there is a big difference between family and relationship.
When you are in a relationship, then you have to be able to compromise and yours share your deepest secrets and fears with the one you love.
A narcissist can't do that.
A narcissist is incapable of showing any kind of empathy or interest in anyone other than themselves.
These people believe that they are special in every way and they look for others People they think aren't.
In this way they can satisfy their ego and their self-confidence, which, on a closer look, is mostly very low.
They cannot take criticism and they need to be sure of the confirmation that other people think highly of them.
If you do the opposite, then a narcissist will make your life miserable because you have criticized and endangered something they love most – themselves .
It would be best for you if you never had anything to do with a narcissist, but sadly most of us aren't that lucky.
That's why we end up in a deep hole where a narcissist put us.
For your own well-being, you must learn how to recognize a narcissist and how to deal with him: his tactics, the consequences , when to get out of a relationship with a narcissist, and ways to ignore a narcissist.
How to spot a narcissist and how to deal with it
It's not usually that hard to spot a narcissist, but the real problem occurs when you meet a dangerous narcissist, one who is not immediately recognizable as such.
One who only pretends to be one of the good guys before you fall head over heels for him and he drags you into his spider web, giving you no way to run away and you end up full and are in his power.
It's always the same story. In the beginning everything is perfect.
You feel so lucky that you finally found the man of your dreams who loves you and who wants to go with you to the ends of the earth; rd.
You even feel a little guilty that your happiness is so immense; is. But this happiness does not last long. After a while, you start noticing his true self.
You see he's showing his true colors. The honeymoon period is over and he starts doing things that annoy you.
He tries to manipulate and control you but you don't measure it too much importance because after all we all make mistakes and nobody is perfect.
So you forget about all the bad things that happen. But in reality you are lying to yourself.
Sooner or later you find yourself in a narcissistic hell from which there is absolutely no escape.
How As I said before, not all narcissists are the same.
Some of them you can recognize right away, but some you can't recognize until you've dealt with them before, as in the case of the &ldquo ;happy” Narcissists.
They trick you’s light because it’s always so fun to be around them. They are charismatic, they have a good sense of humor and are generally kind.
And when you realize that all of this is just lies, they already have you in the sack . They lock you in your own body and brainwash you.
They turn you into a person you never wanted to be.
< em>To avoid this, you should read the following bullet points carefully on how to identify and deal with a narcissist.
1. He is the most important person to himself
He only talks about himself. This is definitely the best way to spot a narcissist. Just do a little test.
If you're out at night and a man approaches you, don't say much at first when he starts talking to you.
And if he doesn’t seem to mind, and what is more, he’s always talking only about himself, then you definitely have a ”happy narcissist” Found a rare specimen.
He will never listen to what you have to say and if you think he does, don't let that fool you.
He's just looking for phrases you say to keep talking about himself.
What to do:It's a good thing that you caught the narcissist's alert before it's too late.
If you really can't pull yourself out of the conversation, just let it be talk as much as he likes, that's why he does it (listening to himself talking) and pretend you're listening.
You're thinking to yourself while you're at it Make an escape plan, escape at the first opportunity and don't look back.
2. He's angry when he's hurt
We all get angry, but not insanely angry. However, he does when he gets angry and has no control over that behavior.
Usually, narcissists only get sad when one of their plans doesn't work out because, as mentioned above, narcissists have no empathy for other people, so they can't understand or notice other people's pain.
He will usually blame you for all his failures and somehow he will succeed.
What to do:< /strong> The first thing to do is never let him into your head. Don't let yourself feel guilty for things you never did.
This is referred to as "gaslighting" called and he will try to use this method on you. He's trying to convince you of things that never happened.
He's trying to make you think you're the crazy one, so one day you'll catch it start trusting him completely because you don't trust yourself anymore.
The only thing you can do in a situation like this is threaten to leave him and then it really pull through.
This is going to really annoy him because nobody has the right to just walk away from him because he's so important, but you just did that.
You just have to find the courage to stand up toü To claim about such people, because then they can no longer hurt you.
3. He never lives by the rules
He's too important for rules. He thinks rules don't apply to him because he's too good to be guided by things other people have written or said.
He thinks he is a man who lives by his own rules.
He will also ignore the fact that you live by rules or morals and he will break those rules just to show you that he doesn’t care if you think something is right or not.
What to do: Try this trait like this as early as possible.
If he doesn't respect the way you live and the things that you consider important, then he doesn't respect you.
Leave him as soon as possible because it's going away will only get worse at this point.
4. He tries to control you
He will always be looking over your shoulder and manipulating you into doing things that you don't want to do, unlike him.< /p>
He will control your life and start with small things like canceling a meeting at the last minute, showing up late or making a meeting happen when and where he wants.
This narrows your scope of action and he makes himself the boss of your relationship. Later he will control you by forbidding you to say what you want.
He will choke you in the middle of a conversation because he feels that what he has to say is more important than what you wanted to say.
What to do:The only thing you can do besides leave him is to ignore everything he has to say.
Do what you think is right and let yourself go cannot be controlled by him.
Never agree to his terms, they are only to his advantage and to your detriment.
He will probably go completely nuts, but by that point you already will be far away from him.
5. He doesn't respect your boundaries
He doesn’t think your boundaries are important and he will keep pushing your boundaries until he completely destroys you.
He will probably ask you to do something you are not comfortable with and if you decline, then he won't say "no" accept.
I mean, he'll tell you everything's fine, but he'll already be planning a vicious mind game to force you to do it, thereby ignoring all your principles.< /p>
What to do:Just stay strong and true to yourself. Never do things that you think are wrong.
Even though your mind is already being manipulated, somewhere deep inside you know what is right and what is wrong. He can't take that from you. Stand up for yourself and fight to your last breath.
Now you have learned how to recognize a narcissist and how to deal with a narcissist. Let's move on to the next dangerous part, the manipulation.
Tactics Narcissists Use To Manipulate You
The best Tactics they resort to are called ”hoovering” called.
This is a special tactic they use when you have decided to put an end to the haunting and after you have decided to stop being emotionally exploited.
This is her greatest weapon after you realize how much love and self-esteem you've lost in this relationship with a narcissist.
&rdquo ;Hoovering” is a manipulative technique used to pull a person back into a dysfunctional relationship.
Typically, the 'hoovering' tactic is used when some time has passed without contact with each other after the breakup.
The narcissist uses manipulation to target their victim's weak points and lure them back into the trap.
1. They twist the words in your mouth
Let's assume that narcissists can read your mind.
There is a lot of truth behind this assumption, though , because narcissists make you feel like you're crazy by disregarding your thoughts and feelings.
This is called “mind reading” called.
Narcissists are reinforced in their belief that they can read your mind and every time you want to say something they interrupt you and make an assumption because they are sure they already knew what you were saying wanted to say.
It never occurs to them that they could be wrong, because they never are.
If you try to stand up for yourself and confront them, they will pretend the truth is completely different.
2. They change the subject
Whenever you want to confront narcissists about something they've done, they will gracefully change the subject to use another topic to draw attention away from themselves. That's their way of communicating.
They'll address things you did wrong two years ago and they'll rub it in your face and make themselves look like the victim.
< p>They'll always have that ace up their sleeve for situations like this.
Whenever you do something wrong, they'll pretend they don't mind just to bring up the subject again , if it suits you.
3. They stalk you and want to destroy your reputation
They will try with all their might to convince other people that you are the toxic part in the relationship and that it was you who destroyed it.
They will slander you and speak badly of you behind your back because their ultimate goal is to portray you in a way that no one will talk to you and make sure that you have nowhere to go after you leave them.
They will bully the people who love you and hang out with you, and they will try to tell them false things about you.
Now you will find out who your true friends are.
4. They will be sarcastic and talk to you in a condescending manner
Their number one goal is to make you feel worthless and to hurt you .
It's one thing to laugh and share a laugh, but it's quite another when they use sarcasm to weaken you and make you feel like a To be nothing.
And if you bring it up with them, you're boring and don't know how to joke.
It doesn't matter that those jokes were for the sole purpose of hurting you.
< p>Also, they talk to you in a patronizing way, like you are a child that you can't talk to normally and have to use easier expressions to make you understand.
It makes you feel goofy and disrespected and that's exactly what they had in mind all along.
After some time you will start to doubt yourself because you can never please them and that leads to you not saying anything anymore and again they have achieved their goal.
5. They will gaslight you
This tactic is also one of the most popular manipulation options. They like to use this method because it is quite simple.
Narcissists want to make sure you never leave them by convincing you that you can't handle living alone.
They want to convince you that you can't live without them live.
This takes away your respect and love for yourself, because by making you believe that some things are not real, you doubt your sanity and everything else as well.
This damages your confidence and love for yourself and drags you down to the level of the narcissist.
You end up trusting the man who takes advantage of you because you think you don't know any better.
6. They will criticize you and give you tasks that you can't possibly accomplish
They plan everything to give you impossible tasks that you can never fulfill and that's why you will feel like shit because everything you try will never work.
Even if you succeed at something, they will find something bad about it and criticize you.
It is extremely difficult to take it lightly when you are constantly faced with criticism that is not constructive but is only meant to hurt you.
The purpose of this tactic is to make you feel like you are not enough for him and that you are happy appreciate that you have it.
Once you recognize these manipulations that narcissists use to take advantage of you and when you finally leave them, then you must deal with the inevitable consequences.
The consequences of a relationship with a narcissist
1. You need to regain his confidence
Your confidence is on the bottom and you need to pull yourself together and make it through this phase.
After a relationship with a narcissist you feel alone and lonely.
You have no dignity and you are afraid – Fear of life and fear that something like this will happen again.
You must not give up. You have to keep going because one day you will be fine. Your life is not over yet.
2. You are vulnerable and scared
You trusted him and he took advantage of you. You will try to hide the fact that you are afraid.
You will try to hide the fact that you are vulnerable and everything makes you cry.
You will pretend that everything is fine with you, but your eyes and the way you behave will betray you.
Don't be afraid and don't hide behind your vulnerability, because this is the real you in this moment.
Accept it and go to next phase over. Try to win another battle. Because that's how you win the war.
3. You will keep your experiences to yourself
You will not be well. You won't want to smile because the ground has been pulled out from under your feet.
And you won't tell anything about what happened to you. Maybe you're afraid that other people will judge you or say “I told you so”.
Or maybe you're afraid of something like this happening to you again, which is why you build an emotional barrier around yourself and decide never to expose yourself like that again.
You decide never to expose anyone again to let into your heart. You decide that you will never let anyone love you again.
4. All you know is fear
You no longer feel safe in your own body.
The memories of him haunt you and it makes it very difficult for you to breathe just thinking about him.
You are afraid that you will bump into him and he will lull you into sleep and will brainwash you again like the first time. You think you'll never be normal again.
5. You doubt every person
You think that all people are like him. You're scared because of him that there aren't any good people left in the world.
You lived through the horror and it changed you.
You look at every person you meet in a way that is shaped by the time you were with him.
During that time he used you emotionally until there was almost nothing left of you.
6. You will hide your feelings
You will be too afraid to show your true feelings because you are afraid that someone will come and take advantage of your feelings and you are not ready for the next relationship yet.
God only knows if you can ever be that again.
But don't lose hope. Not all men are like that and maybe someday you'll meet someone you're meant to be.
7. You'll apologize all the time
You've gotten used to taking the blame.
You've gotten used to to apologize for things you did and also for things you didn't do.
You did it because you couldn't take the arguments and criticism any longer.
You had enough of his tantrums and accepted that it was all your fault.
But the sad thing is that after a while you yourself believed that it was all your fault.
Now you're doing the exact same thing again – only now you don't have to apologize anymore.
8. You will hate yourself
You can no longer look at yourself in the mirror because every time you look at yourself you see a woman who is at the end of her strength.
It's not you. He has taken the real you away and made you a tired woman who's down. That's why you hate yourself – you allowed it.
But don't worry, you will find your old strength again and you will become the beautiful woman you used to be. Just wait.
The most important step in this article on narcissists is knowing the right ways to ignore a narcissist, not let them into your head, and deny them the power they think they have has about you.
Ignoring a narcissist is the key to your way back into life because no matter what you do that he doesn't like, he will try to quit to be yours.
The catch is that you have to ignore him, so his plan fails and you end up the winner.
Methods to ignore a narcissist.
1. Ignore a narcissist to hurt them
When a narcissist is done with you, you will feel miserable. You don’t want to live your life anymore because he took it from you.
If this had happened to you under normal circumstances, if someone else had hurt you, your first reaction would have been revenge.
You want to do something bad to the person to make them so suffers as you have suffered.
But it doesn’t work that way with narcissists because it is impossible to play games with them.
They will take the gauntlet; turn around and you'll end up back as the one who got hurt again.
If you really want to heal and harm them, then your best bet is to ignore the narcissist.
Stopping giving them attention and meaning will hit them the hardest.
But you must already be in the healing process while ignoring him.
Don't try to find out if he feels hurt because you pretend he doesn't exist.
Finding out how he's doing will only make him feel like he still has power over you.
So shut him out of your life completely and focus on yourself. This will destroy him.
2. Don't give them any more energy or satisfaction
Narcissists are not like normal people.
Normal people draw energy from positive things like love and friendship, but narcissists get their energy from arguments, conflicts and pain.
You can see that deep down they are not happy with themselves.
They have a very bad opinion of themselves and that's why they created these alter egos (fake personalities) to hide their insides/real selves.
So if you give them the satisfaction and be part of them arguments and poisoned thoughts, you will only feed their narcissistic souls.
But by ignoring a narcissist, you deny him the nourishment for his negative energy and this slowly eats him from the inside out on.
3. Ignore your crisis
You think you've done it all once you ignore him and you're free. But unfortunately that's not the case and we know that. he.
He knows that you are still attached to him. He knows you need a dose of him because he has become like a drug to you.
Because of this, he will wait out the contactless period between you two and then attack when you are in a crisis – when you doubt yourself and your ability to live without him.
This is where many women make a mistake. They have a crisis and then they come back to him and he welcomes them again with open arms and swears that he will change.
But after a while he will behave as before.
Ignore your need to go back to him. Ignore his lies and promises that he will change because he never will.
It's just another tactic to lure you back into this dysfunctional relationship.
Keep being strong and ignore these moments hell-bent. This will disarm him and he will become powerless.
4. The most important thing is to love yourself
That's the biggest defeat you can inflict on him. If you stay true to yourself and never doubt yourself, then he can't touch you.
If you're strong and don't let him play his games with you, then you can never hurt his mind games.
Narcissists are helpless when their victims rediscover their sense of self and respect for themselves, because then they can't hurt them anymore .
Then the love story between a narcissist and his victim is over once and for all.