I'm tired of this right now. I hate that I have to say this. I hate to give up, but this time I have no other option.
In fact, you left me no other option.
I destroy all ties to the times in that I was happy (was is the key word here).
Because it's been some time since I've felt true joy.
I caught myself holding on to something that may never have been there.
I hate that feeling and the desire to have another chance.
Something keeps telling me that if I gave us one more chance, it could work out between the two of us.
If I did it this time tried some more things would change.
The only problem with this is that it wasn't me who should have given us both another chance.
It wasn't me who should have tried harder. I'm not the one to leave this relationship in debt.
I guarantee I will always remind myself of this.
I've had enough of this, to invest all my efforts in a person who has lived on the glory of the past for so long.
I'm tired of asking myself if I'm worth it just because someone I'm with doesn't bother.
I hate that I I'm the one who always texts first and starts conversations first.
I hate being the one who always insists on spending time with you – I don't deserve attention too
You were polite to me, but I didn’t need it.
I needed love, the feeling that you made an effort and that you made me feel at home.
Just like I made you feel like I was your safe haven. I needed to know that I can count on you as much as you can count on me.
The ugly truth is that you were never insecure about me, you were in relation to yourself.
The only problem with that is that you carried that over into our relationship.
I did everything I could to prove to you that I was yours, but you cheated on me over and over again ;sush.
I accepted that and fell in love with the person you are.
And it would have stayed that way for a thousand more years, but this feeling was not mutual.
You made me question everything about who I am and constantly thinking about what I need to change about myself in order for you to take notice of me.
I've tried to meet your expectations. I tried harder than ever in my life for you to love me.
I have no idea what else I could have done. That's why it was with the two of us.
I have no more idea how to make you love me again or love me at all.
Now I'm unsure about all that we had. You made me question everything we experienced together and everything I felt.
I wonder why you even got together with me.
I wanted this relationship to work. I really wanted it. But I hated that I was the only one of us who wanted it.
I'm going to hate looking back in a few months and seeing that time as wasted time, but I'm starting to get that feeling.
I hate that I'm giving my time and all my love to someone wasted taking it all for granted.
I'm tired of making you look better in the eyes of my friends.
I hated them for saying that I was wasting my time with you. I tried to convince them otherwise and instead they were right.
There is no future for us as of now.
That's why I'm tired of making you try. I'm tired of trying new things to make you happy.
I'm tired of waiting for you to wake up. You slept too long. And I got far away from you in the meantime.
The sad thing is that I never stopped believing in you.
I never allowed myself to doubt you when other people spoke badly about you, because I did was convinced that you were born to do extraordinary things.
Maybe you aren't with me either.
I'm tired of cheering you on and putting my life aside for someone I'm not even sure cares about me.
< p>I don't blame you for that. You didn't ask.
It's just that I'll do anything for love. I give everything because I expect everything from you in return.
In love, it's all or nothing for me. I either go all out or not at all.
I think that's how it is in relationships – you know; never whether the other is worth it or not.
You have to let the other person prove it to you before you get too deep into this.
I'm tired of being the spark of your life. I'm tired of making you happy and making you proud of me.
Because I just can't live up to the expectations you have of me have. I can't be the woman you want.
Obviously nothing is good enough for you and you are never completely satisfied. So I'm ending this now.
To fill the emptiness you feel, I should have been someone else and that would have killed me.
I would hate myself for changing just so you can set another milestone.
I ever would had an end? Would you ever be completely satisfied with me? I doubt it.
I did my best and the saddest part is that my best wasn't good enough.
I didn't realize my flaws until I met you.
< p>When I looked in the mirror I wondered if you would have wanted me more if I had changed a few more things.
But there would always be something given what I should have changed about myself, so what's the point?
It's easier for you to find a new person than for me to change completely.
I want you to know that I wasn't the first to give up on us both . You were the one who left a long time ago.
You only stayed physically present. I'm just doing what you did to me a long time ago, but I have the courage to do it right.
Leaving someone who hurts me now is less painful than if I did stay.
Because for me it would mean to die if I stayed.
By walking away, even if this path will be painful, I give us the chance that each of us will meet someone who will love us the way we deserve.
I'm sorry I couldn't be that person for you .
I know that the first official days without you will almost kill me.
Because no matter what happened, you were always my highlight of the day.
You were my safe haven and I loved coming to your house.
I have these loved the illusion that you were mine, even if only in a small part.
For the first few days you won't even notice that I'm not there am.
Even if you notice my absence, you will thank God for the place you have now.
But eventually you will realize. And I promise you will miss me.
You will miss the person who took care of you. You will miss the person who loved you unconditionally.
You will miss the person who did everything to make you happy.
And you will think that I have now become a person who is no longer interested in you.
I know our paths will cross again and you will see me holding another man's hand and greeting you with a smile.
You will see , that I'm fine and maybe secretly I want you to be the man by my side.
Maybe in the man I found everything I expected from you.
When I meet you, I will not always be confident.
I will always treat you as a what if? because I hate that our relationship is broken.
I will have found someone who will care for me as much as I cared for you .
I will have found someone who will respect me like I respected you.
I will have found someone who knows I'm worthy just like you did it in the beginning.
I will have found someone to whom I mean the whole world, just like you meant the whole world to me in the beginning.
< strong>And then it suddenly becomes clear to you. Then you suddenly realize what I've known from the beginning.
We could have had anything if we just tried hard enough would have given.
You will see me with the person who recognized my worth from the start.