When you are with someone, it goes without saying that your partner is the strongest wind beneath your wings.
This person should be your greatest; ’biggest support & be your biggest fan. He should push you the most when you're down or going through difficult times.
And of course you should do the same for him.
It goes without saying ;finally that you are both partners and that you should support each other.
But you were never like that. I know I don't know if you were intimidated by my strength or if you were just naturally insecure and wanted to bring me down to your level.
But the fact is for always doing everything in your power to belittle and devalue me.
Of course, your behavior was initially subtle. You didn't insult me directly, but you always implied that you're better than me and that I'm below your level in every possible way.
But over time you have you abused me more and more, more and more directly and more and more subtly, and belittled me in every way.
You never missed an opportunity to depress me and wake up my insecurities.
And over time you also started insulting and taunting me in front of others.
When you first met me I was a confident woman who knew exactly what I was worth and you couldn't weaken my confidence.
But over the years you have you somehow managed to slip into my head and I'm beginning to wonder if any of what you've been telling me is even true.
< strong>Over the years, I've become a woman who doubts my every step, my self-esteem and sometimes even my sanity.
I was starting to have doubts about whether I was pretty or beautiful enough, whether I was smart enough, and whether I even deserved to be with you.
Every time I set my mind to something, I could hear your voice in the back of my head telling me I couldn't do it and that I should stop.
I started thinking about mine To doubt competences and abilities in all areas of life.
I questioned my career, my relationships with other people and most importantly my relationship with myself.
I asked myself if I was lovable and if I had the respect and value of others ;deserve the respect of others.
And worst of all, I was beginning to wonder if I deserved my own love and respect.
I wondered if I was good was enough and why I wasn't good enough.
And when I admitted that it was all your fault, I even started to doubt my sanity.
I thought that you loved me unconditionally and that you would never play mind games with me.
Of course, I wouldn't have openly admitted any of this, would I once against myself. I tried to hide the opinion I had about myself, but that didn't change anything.
And it was all your fault.
That knows me because I regained my confidence from the moment I left you.
Of course, this didn't happen overnight and it will take a while, but I felt these inexplicable relief when I left you.
Sure, it hurt, but it was also a relief.
But I'm not writing all this to you because I hate you for everything you've done to me, and I don't do it because I want or need an apology from you.
I'm telling you all this because I want to tell you that you didn't make it.
I want you to know that you didn't succeeded in destroying me spiritually and destroying the person I used to be.
I am telling you all this because I want you to know that I'm good enough. Now I'm happier without you.
Sure, you were close to destroying me spiritually, but I rose from the ashes stronger than ever.< /p>
And I know how precious I really am. I know I have no reason to be insecure.
I know what I'm worth, and I know what I'm worth. exactly that neither you nor anyone else can weaken my self-esteem.
Most of all, I know; me that I should never have doubted myself. Instead, you should have doubted yourself from the start.