What nobody tells you about narcissists is that they are really good disguise artists and a woman who is with a narcissist will never realize until it's too late.
Until she's left alone, broken and drained, and left to pick up her own pieces.
And she's going to take a hell of a long time to heal because the aftermath of a relationship with a narcissist is tremendous.
A woman who's been with a narcissist has a broken one Self-esteem.
After dating a narcissist, this woman will be completely lost.
She will have very low self-esteem – if there is any left after the narcissist is done with her.
She will lose her dignity, her self-respect, and all the confidence she had in herself before the narcissist came into her life.
A woman who dated a narcissist, will be touchy and anxious all the time.
Everything about her – her eyes, the way she acts when someone new talks to her – everything screams that her past has made her the most sensitive woman.
A woman who has been with a narcissist will only smile because she has to.
She doesn't want to smile, but for the one not worrying about those who care about her will bring a smile to her face.
She has forgotten what happiness feels like and she hasn't for a long time smiled more wholeheartedly.
This is the price she paid for letting the narcissist into her life.
A woman who has been with a narcissist will not want to talk about what happened. She will develop her own defense mechanism.
She will be careful, she will turn people off Walk away and always be busy with something to forget the hell she went through and the hell she is still living in as a result of the relationship with a narcissist.
A woman who has dated a narcissist will have anxiety and depression as best friends.
In the beginning she might have been very different, maybe she wasn't that scared or that depressed, but a relationship with a narcissist doesn't come without its price.
Typically, anxiety and depression come as side effects of a toxic relationship, and it will take time for her to feel normal again.< /p>
Recovering from and surviving the effects of a relationship with a narcissist will not be easy.
It will be a very arduous and lengthy healing process and many people won't understand why it's taking so long and why she can't ”just get over it”.
Only those who really care about her will stay with her that long , as she needs them.
Only those who truly love her will stay with her throughout this time and will be her greatest support as she will never be able to get through this on her own.
This woman who dated a narcissist forgot the good in people.
You can't understand it because you've probably never experienced anything like it – and you should be glad you just got away with it.
Unfortunately, she's not. She fell in love with the wrong person and lost so much.
But the worst part is that she doesn't believe there are good people out there.
She just can't believe it because her past makes her see her tormentor in everyone else see who she meets.
She recovers neither from a lost love affair nor from the failure of a relationship, but from a war.
It won't be easy for her to get over what happened to her, but she will. She'll take more time than you think. And your impatience will only hurt her.
If you don't want to help her, don't make things worse by judging her.
Do you really think she wouldn't become normal or want to be happy or the way she was before she fell into the narcissist's nest? She wants it, but she knows; just don't like.
She will need constant appreciation.She long ago forgot what it felt like to be fearless – what it feels like not to be afraid or not having to be careful.
She has forgotten what it feels like not to expect anything bad.
So she will need to hear from you that the nightmare is over and that everything will be fine.
She needs to hear from you that she doesn’t need to be scared or worried because you will always be there to be her protector.
< p>She will have a hard time trusting people. Her past taught her not to trust anyone because whoever was closest to her brought her closest to hell.< /p>
Therefore, when someone new tries to come into her life, she will have doubts.
She will take every good deed with a pinch of suspicion as she thinks she will pay for it later – and she will pay for it.
It will take her some time before she welcomes someone new into her life or decides to love. Love is for she now feels a very strange and unfamiliar one.
What she once thought was love turned into the most toxic feeling and made her a prisoner of her tormentor.
She won't allow herself to develop feelings for anyone – let alone the feeling of love. She is so hurt.
She will always apologize. Because she has been through hell, she will have to apologize – even for the things that aren't her fault.
She has learned that the best way to avoid emotional hits is to take all the blame on to take, and she did when she was dating a narcissist.
That's something she's going to have a hard time getting rid of, so don't be surprised if you hear her yell “I'm sorry” for the most insignificant little thing. says because this is her defense mechanism and it will take her a while to get rid of it.
She will hide her feelings. In her previous relationship with a narcissist had ”feel” always a price.
The more she showed her feelings, the worse he treated her.
Therefore you will never be able to see what she really feels.
She will be afraid of appearing too clingy, too emotional, too sensitive or even boring with all her emotions.
She'll be afraid you won't understand, so she'll take the "easy" Walking away by always choosing to suppress her feelings.
Nothing about this recovery process will be easy.She will have frequent mood swings.
Often she will want to be isolated and she will protect her heart more than you can imagine.
She will need constant recognition – you will have to prove to her day by day that you are there, that you are not leaving and that you understand what happened to her.
You need to show her that she is not alone, that you care and that together the two of you can get through whatever happened.
It will take her a lot of time and she may never be become the person you want to be. All of this will be overwhelming in some moments.
But it will be worth it. It is not her fault that she is the way she is now. She just can't live any other way.
She's an amazing person – or at least she was before she fell into the clutches of a narcissist – but she can recover.
It takes a lot of work, but she can eventually become a normal person.
She needs someone to show her that there are good people in this world.
She deserves someone who will not just talk but will be there for her, making promises and actually keeping them.
She needs someone to put her first Spot after being last for so long.
She needs someone to prove to her that she matters and someone to cry to.
She needs someone to help her heal and show her that there is more to her life than what she went through with her narcissist.
She needs a good guy to finally break free from what the narcissist did to her.
So if it's you what's important is make sure you're the next good guy for her.
She deserves to get the love she gave to the wrong person.
< p>She deserves to matter. There's still that amazing girl in her.
There's still that girl ready to take on the world and destined to live her life to the fullest to enjoy – but this girl is hiding right now because she got hurt and now she's scared.
Show her that she doesn't need to be scared anymore and all your efforts will pay off after she's gone recovered.