Just as every person is unique, every relationship is unique.
It's hard to compare one to the other and you can never be sure what what actually happens between two people.
We only see a relationship from the outside and only the two people in the relationship know the real feelings for sure.
But we keep seeing these couples who are just happy. look happier than the others.
It seems like they never have problems, like they always agree on everything.
You could even say that they are twin souls are, one soul in two bodies.
One wonders if that is the key to happiness – Two people who are similar, who understand each other.
Do you also have a lot in common with your partner and hope that this means that your relationship will be happy?
Or do you want to be matched with someone who is your complete opposite, because you believe in the old saying opposites attract and yet you hope to find a happy one having a happy relationship?
To get to the bottom of the truth, I spoke to couples in my area and asked them what they think increases their Happiness Index.
Is it their similarities or the opposites? What makes a happy relationship in the long run?
Stay with me for the answer.
Like meets like – Commonalities that make a happy relationship
When I first started talking to couples, every happy couple had their own recipe for happiness.
But as I surveyed more and more happy couples, had a growing number of people are getting the same answers.
These are the things most happy couples swear by that make for a happy relationship.
1. Similar family life
All happy families are alike, every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way writes Tolstoy in the very first sentence of his well-known book Anna Karenina.
And yes, think often we realize that our family is the most embarrassing, but then we talk to other people and realize that some of them have very similar families or family problems.
And yes, our family life is closing us down the people we are today.
These connections, such as the father-daughter relationship, have a huge impact on all of the romantic relationships that we enter into later in life.
Different types of families, such as large; e Families or families with single parents also have different problems and then also have different ways of dealing with these problems.
If we grew up in a similar family, we also know the same issues that shaped us into the people we are today.
We also likely have similar values and priorities; th in life when we were raised alike, but we'll get to that.
2. Same level of education
It's good to have a partner who always knows the answer to all questions if you want to take a quiz.
But im everyday life can be a bit tiring when he keeps touching you up.
If one of the partners has a much higher level of education than the other, it can lead to awkward situations.
For example, if one partner keeps checking Business Insider to see how the current economic situation is looks and the other partner has no idea, this can be uncomfortable for the partner.
The partner with the lower level of education may actually feel less valuable, especially in an environment where, for example, the partner's colleagues meet and he needs to spend time with them.
Same level of education usually also means a similar cultural awareness, which is also important.
3. Comparatively similar income
Partners with similar incomes simply feel more equal than when one earns much more or is even the only one with an income.
Having an income of your own also means independence and greater self-confidence, which of course is important for a healthy relationship.
Something that is quite interesting though is that most happy people happy couples also have the same opinion about spending money.
When one is always the one who makes sure that the household budget is full and the other one just goes shopping without much thought, it comes hard; frequent problems.
When someone is always turning over every cent and thinking carefully about whether they want to make a purchase and the other one buys a new smartwatch without hesitation or regularly gets new hairstyles from the trend hairdresser, this can lead to resentment among the partners.
4. The Desire for a Stable Relationship
Some relationships are destined from the start to be successful.
Half of the couples surveyed who said they were happy couples said they were really looking for a serious and long-term relationship.
Yes, you really can't love plan.
We can't decide who we fall in love with and when, but sometimes we meet someone special and if we're not ready for a relationship then it can't be .
But if we are aware that we are ready for a relationship, then we immediately look for a partner with whom we can imagine our future.
Someone who is very sociable and someone who prefers to spend time alone will have a hard time agreeing on how to spend their evening.
And it's not just one night. In a long-term relationship, it's night after night, week after week, month after month.
What's even more interesting is that the bad sides we have in common bring us closer.
It's easier to overlook a partner's flaws and mistakes when we know we share the same ones have and he also loves us with them.
6. Common goals, values and priorities
Common life goals, values and priorities are probably the most important thing for a happy relationship after love and trust.
A happy partnership means being a team. In a team, the common goal is much more important than your own success.
Goals and ideas should be discussed as early as possible in the relationship.
If the relationship is serious you should be able to answer certain relationship questions, precisely because they are so crucial.
You should know how your partner feels about certain issues, such as his political views, children, distribution of tasks, moral Values etc.
Finding out after five years that your partner doesn’t want children or has even made it a goal to live in another country is not easy and brings with it a lot of lovesickness and unhappiness.
< h3>7. A similar sense of honesty
I don't lie to my partner, but I don't necessarily tell them everything either.
He never asked me if I still talk to my ex-partner from time to time. If he had asked, I would have told him the truth.
Yes, what isn't a bad thing for one is a major breach of trust for another.
If you haven't agreed on how much honesty and openness you expect from each other, it can be a bit problematic be.
While we are not technically lying, if we deliberately withhold from our partner something that could hurt them, it is the same as a lie and it is certainly not a recipe for ;r a happy relationship.
8. Common Interests
If one partner is happiest when they're at home every night and the other loves to party, that can last for a while.
You don't necessarily have to do everything together, but when you have very different personalities and enjoy very different things, alienation occurs over time.
Time together is a must for a long-term relationship and when you share the same interests it is much easier to find time for each other.
A common hobby that both enjoy can be the key be in a happy relationship.
9. Similar physical needs
If one of the partners likes to cuddle all day long, even in public, and for the other a quick kiss is quite enough to showing love can also cause problems.
Either one has to allow much more physical closeness than suits him or the other feels that something is missing in the relationship.
Women understand physical needs to include hugs and kisses ;se, while for the men surveyed it mostly means a satisfying love life.
Especially among the youngest couples, this similarity was in the first place.
Most couples mentioned that regular sex is important to them, so having sex weekly shows them that they are loved and desirable.
10. Corresponding Sense of Romance
When a partner thinks a romantic evening means watching the sunset together, waiting for the stars, and just spending the whole night hugging outside and the other person prefers to think of a good restaurant as romantic, it can also be a problem.
Romantic gestures and surprises are a part of every relationship.
But unless both partners have the same taste and neither is enjoying their date night, it doesn't make much sense either.
One should always try to compromise so that there is something for everyone.
11. Similar sense of humor
A similar sense of humor can be just as important to a happy relationship.
You've probably seen at least one couple where one of the partners tells a joke and the other just stands there and rolls his eyes.
You certainly didn't say Oh, that is a happy partnership.
On the other hand, sometimes there is that special connection that comes from humor.
You've probably found yourself listening to someone and something they say reminds you of a funny event in your life.
You just look at your partner and you smile you both. The same scene is playing out in your minds, the same picture gallery of memories.
You both know what you're thinking without talking to each other. Sometimes you even have to be careful not to make eye contact with your partner or you'll roll over laughing.
12. A corresponding sense of order
He leaves his dirty socks everywhere. It annoys you.
Yes, it's a cliché, but a cliché arises because we all experience it.
I'll be honest, it's not always the man who is messy. Sometimes it's us women, too.
If the same partner is always the one who cleans and tidies up and the other doesn't even bother, that will definitely lead to relationship problems.
< p>You want to be an equal partner and not a cleaning lady, don't you?
If these similarities are so important to the relationship, why do we keep hearing that opposites attract? ? Is that just a lie?
Not really. It is also partly true that opposites attract.
Especially in the beginning, something that is unknown is interesting for us.
It's exciting to try to understand. Too much resemblance can also be a bit boring.
Imagine that there is no dominant part in a relationship.
Yes, of course both should be in one relationship can be equal, but you're probably familiar with this game that young couples especially often play at the end of the conversation.
This you should hang up. No, you should hang up. nope You should hang up. And so on.
Try to imagine that, only this time it's about some decision in the relationship.
It's good to take the lead sometimes.
Even when dancing one must lead and the other follow. It's best if the partners take turns and one isn't always the dominant one.
Similarities or opposites, what's the secret?
So actually, that's it Secret of a successful relationship is sharing the similarities and respecting the opposites.
We need both to function well.
We need the things that unite us, but we also need the things in which we are different.
Perhaps these in particular also lead to us learning from our partner and becoming better people.
But much more important than Similarities or opposites for a successful relationship are open communication, positive attitude and that we are both willing to compromise.