I'm tired of waiting to mean something to you

The worst part of life is the waiting. The best part of life is having someone worth waiting for.

My dear someone,

I've never been a girl, that rushed things. I believed that good things take time.

I knew that the things you waited for were the most valuable in the end.

I guess that Waiting is what made them so special and valuable in the first place.

You know, I've never been afraid to wait. I believed in the beauty behind the wait.

Until I realized that maybe I was waiting for someone and something that would most likely never happen.

And there's nothing nice in waiting for something that was never on its way to you.

I'm sorry , but just giving me your crumbs wouldn't be enough.

I'm not the type of girl who settles for the bare minimum.

If I'm willing to give you all of me, I expect nothing less.

And although I always wore my heart on my sleeve with you and you knew where you stood with me, I never knew where I stood with you.

If you love someone, you should make sure that the other person knows what you want and that they are at the top of your priority list.

Unfortunately, I don't think I ever made your list.

You kept me at bay, and that's exactly where you wanted me.

Just about close enough that you can reach me if you need me and close enough that i can't get too close to you. Do you see the problem now?

If you can't understand what you did wrong, then I have no problem pointing out the obvious:

I had no desire to be "another fish in the sea" to be.

I didn't want to be just anyone, I wanted to mean something to you.

I waited and waited for you to make an effort to make me show that you saw who I was and I was waiting for you to choose me.

Like I'm waiting for Godot.

No matter how many times I was told that waiting for you was in vain, I didn't want to listen.

I guess I wasn't ready to let you go.

I wasn't ready to shake off the idea of ​​what we could have been.

I figured this idea out of you and me, and the perfect you wanted me to be someone for you.

But like I said, it was just me who imagined you in the ideal.

And I've been waiting for the ideal for you to choose me. 

My dreams were shattered when I realized that you weren't perfect at all, it was me who made you that way.

You see, the perfect you you would never have put me off . That perfect you wouldn't have paid me enough attention to think you were into me.

The perfect you would never have used me the way you used me.

Not only did it occur to me that we could have been more, you actually made me believe it.

And when I got my hopes up, you backed off.

You decided that I got enough love from you and that you now have me for life.

If I started to doubt us, you would make an effort and I would fall in love with you again.

I was addicted, to be honest.

The naïve side of me believed in this dream that I finally found someone who cared for me and wanted me.

The side that had been through many intertwined situations in life knew better.

And I finally let the other side handle these things.

Today I decided that this would be the day I stopped waiting. Because enough is enough. 

Today was supposed to be the day I stopped spending even a minute of my time thinking about you.

I don't want to think about the things we could have been if you never believed we could be anything at all.

I won't beg anyone to love me.

I won't beg you to love me.

I learned a long time ago that it in the hopeless plans to get someone to stay makes no sense.

I'm too valuable to chase someone who doesn't know my worth and wait for someone who doesn't appreciate my worth.

I want to be loved unconditionally and I shouldn't work so hard for it. r have to fight. I'm worth more than that and one day you'll see it.

Just so you know, whether that was your intention or not, you didn't get the best of me.

You were pretty close, but I got out just in time.

Waiting for you didn't break me in the end, but it taught me a valuable lesson.

In fact, I still believe that good things take time. I'm as naive as I was at the beginning of the story.

I choose to believe in love and in the existence of someone out there who doesn't have to think twice before choosing me .

I believe there is someone who doesn't make love so difficult.

I believe there is someone who recognizes my worth and recognizes my value.< /strong>