I'm leaving because you didn't know how to keep me

I'm leaving because you didn't know how to keep me

You put me through unimaginable pain. I gave you all of me and you always took me for granted. You always told me that you love me, but I didn't see that love and I certainly didn't feel it.

You know I'm insecure about your love and ours relationship was, but instead of doing something about it and instead of doing something to prove your love to me, you did the complete opposite. You played mind games with me and you did everything in your power to drive me insane.

In the beginning I really thought you loved me. I wanted that so badly that I convinced myself that you were just a closed person who finds it difficult to to show her feelings. And I accepted you like that.

I never asked you for romantic acts – I just wanted to be loved and needed. I wanted to feel like I could count on you, I wanted you to know that the two of us are a team because that's how I saw us. I wanted you to care about me as much as you do to me.

But you were just playing with me. It took me a long time but I finally realized that you never really loved me and that I was only good for your ego.

You enjoyed that someone would always pick up the phone when you called and you enjoyed that I always dropped everything when you needed me. It's taken me years, but I finally realized that you never cared about me and didn't mean that much to you. I realized that our relationship was special only for me.

And finally I found the courage to leave you. I've decided it's time to end this charade and leave you.

Now you have the gall to blame me for walking away after everything you put me through. After all these painful years you have the nerve to make me feel guilty for leaving you. Now you tell me that you love me and that you can't imagine your life without me.

You never asked yourself why I left you. Now you're trying to convince me that I'm selfish for leaving you, but you never thought of all the pain I've been through because of you.

You never had me asked how I was after you called me names so many times. You never asked me how I felt when I had to fight for the crumbs of your attention and love or when you were stalking other women…

You never thought about my feelings during all the nights I cried myself to sleep, waiting for you because you had more important things to do.

You you never thought about my feelings while i felt unloved for years. And now you want me to think about your feelings and feel guilty for it because I finally left a person who never deserved me, a person who didn't do anything for it, so that I stay by her side?

I could swear that I warned you a thousand times that you would kill all the love I had for you. You worked really hard and although it was difficult, you still made it in the end. Didn't you always want me to go away? You certainly did everything you could to make me do it.

Nonetheless, the thing is, you can't blame me for leaving you because you didn't do anything to keep me. You hate me for leaving, but really you should hate yourself for letting me go, for doing nothing to make me stay and for doing nothing, to stop me.

Instead of having me and blaming me, for once in your life be a man and take responsibility. I know it's easier to project onto me the hate you feel for yourself, but inside you know it was your fault.

So be it not mad at me for leaving. Be mad at yourself for not knowing how to keep me.

It's too late to close things now change, now that you managed to ruin me and all we had.

Remember, I didn't go away, you sent me away . And you're the one who has to live with it.

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