My husband was an emotional sneaky bastard – a complete psychopath. He became abusive physically, sexually and most importantly emotionally.
I'll just tell you one thing – Words hurt like hell! He knew that and that was his greatest weapon!
After we split up (after 12 years of marriage) it hit me – the sudden realization, a summary, if you will, of those horrible 12 years of hell.
He was slowly sneaking his psychotic self into my life, he was emotionally abusing me and I didn't even realize it. I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what – it wasn't until we broke up (and dear god, thank you for that) that a lot of things became clear to me.
These psychotic people have a special ability – you will not realize that you are being emotionally abused.
Read the instructions and learn from my experience and maybe you will be able to save yourself (as I finally did) .
1. He makes you believe that you are responsible for everything
Emotional psychopaths aren't always mean. They can constantly charm you with their words. They have the power to persuade and they never get bored.
One minute you're arguing and the next he's telling you, “It's alright baby. It's not your fault that you're emotional. It’s your fault”.
You end up believing that you are the culprit of the argument and he is the one who is there to make you feel better.
2. He runs Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse in which the perpetrator uses false information and presents it to the victim, causing the victim to question their own sanity – a popular tactic used by emotional abusers.
One day I happened to see some emails that my husband had thoughtlessly left open and I realized that he was cheating on me. When I asked him about it, he yelled at me!
He said he couldn’t believe I would think that; that I'm crazy, that I don't trust him … this went on for a few days.
Soon I began to doubt myself. I was beginning to think that maybe he was right. Maybe I'm the one who's crazy. Maybe I misunderstood the whole thing.
If your psychotic partner doesn't have an excuse, they will create one and make you think you're the ”crazy”.
. He blames you for everything
This may look similar to the first one, but it's not. Anytime he has a problem, he will find a way to blame you.
If he has problems at work, he will make you believe that you are to blame because you charge him at home.
If he gets a ticket, it's your fault because you made him so angry that he drove too fast to vent his anger.
The bottom line, no matter how you spin it, it is always your fault because emotional psychopaths are always right.
4. It destroys you
Emotional psychopaths are cowards who have nothing better to do in life than control you. They plant toxic thoughts in you so you don't think you're an intelligent, beautiful and strong person.
Their goal is to make you believe that you are stupid and useless and they will succeed in that. Once you start believing this crap, you cling to it even tighter, afraid it's the best thing you'll ever have.
Emotional psychopaths can get you let them believe what they want.
5. He “erases you”
He just isolates you from the rest of the world. He convinces you not to hang out with your friends because you don't really need them — you have it.
And what's really behind it — he's afraid your friends will reason with you and encourage you to leave him.
He's spent too much time trying to make you ”perfect” to let your friends ruin you now.
He WILL convince you that he loves you the most and is the only person you should trust.
What a sneaky bastard!